December 2012 was a time of struggle for me as I adjusted to different moments with my family.  Christmas has always been a time of the traditional moments that have been celebrated year after year.  The season in itself can be stressful and when there was so much change that had been going on in my life, I felt lost, alone, making the wrong decisions and I felt so very discouraged.  That Christmas not having a home of my own, it was a struggle in itself to find even the smallest remembrance of our special celebrations.  Squeezing in a few of the favorites from our menu I fixed the one recipe that grounded me “scalloped oysters”, My daddy’s favorite.  As a young girl I always swayed away from ever taking just one bite, then I became the brave soul and would eat the “scallop” part leaving the main ingredient behind.  After saying good bye to the greatest man I ever knew, I jumped right in and oysters became one of my favs!…. soooooo, scalloped oysters are on the menu Thanksgiving and Christmas.  That Christmas it was one of the moments that I felt I had to hold onto.  Since I was usually the only one that would dive into this delicacy there was always leftovers…..just for me daddy…. He would be so proud!   That year as I was eating one of the last bowls in my room alone with my faithful’s Bailey and Mason curled up beside me, I felt a crunch, well not a real crunch, but like I just bit into a rock!  I did, I did just bite into a rock, well not a rock but a pearl!  I couldn’t believe it!  I found a pearl in my oyster!  If not immediately very soon after that dawn of realization washed over me, the whisper that I have come to cherish “You are my pearl” gently brushed my ear.  Oh Lord, you know my struggles, you know my doubts, you know my failures and weaknesses and you know just how to blow all those struggles, doubts, failures and weaknesses away with just a whisper.  I had let the world slide in between the seams of my faith and allowed a rip that could only grow wider as I kept harvesting the thoughts of “ I am not _______ enough”.  “The voice you believe will determine the future you experience” Isaiah 55:1.  With his whisper I began to remember that “I am!”   “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made’ your works are wonderful I know that full well.  My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth” Psalm 139:14-15.  I was a pearl, not just any pearl but my Father’s pearl who made me.  I cleaned the pearl up and placed it in a safe place and smiled every time I recalled that whisper, that told me to remember who “I am”.  I eventually placed it into a locket with other charms that would remind me how far I had come and how tall I could stand.  This past March I was attending Liberty for a week on campus for an intensive class and I opened the locket to shine the pearl, it would rub up against the other charms and would get a little dingy. (Wow, another thoughtful blog on that one!)  I didn’t close the locket tight enough and the only charm that fell out was the pearl……OH NO….. my heart skipped a beat……I couldn’t lose my pearl……the pearl given to me when I was at a very low point…. The pearl that made me remember “I am”…….what? The whisper?…….you have to tell others that they are my pearls too!  I didn’t even stop to look for that small white round gift of grace that I had held onto.  I smiled knowing that someone would find the pearl and would feel the same whisper that I did and they will know that they are God’s pearl, fearfully and wonderfully made and they are as “I am”.